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At some point, you might feel like you're bothering others with your feelings or needs. It's as if you're worried that opening up about what's troubling you will make you a burden to your friends or family. But here's a key thing to remember: people care about you a lot more than you might think. Let's unpack why it's important to share your feelings and how it actually strengthens relationships.

Understanding Why You Feel Like a Burden

Firstly, why do some of us feel like we're a burden? This thought can sprout from various situations. Maybe you don't want to add to someone else's problems, or perhaps you think your worries are small compared to what others are going through. This feeling can also come from a fear of being vulnerable. Being open about your thoughts and emotions can make you feel exposed and susceptible to judgement or rejection. However, it's important to know that everyone has their own struggles, and sharing them doesn't make you weak or a nuisance; it makes you human. Opening up about what you're feeling isn't just about seeking help, but also about building trust and strengthening bonds.

The Importance of Sharing Your Feelings

• Reduces stress: Talking about your worries can lighten the emotional load you're carrying. It's like letting air out of a balloon that's about to burst.
• Builds stronger relationships: When you share, it often leads others to open up. This back-and-forth of sharing and listening can create stronger, more meaningful connections.
• Offers new perspectives: Sometimes, discussing a problem might lead to solutions or viewpoints you hadn't considered before.
• Inspires support: Most people want to help and support their friends and loved ones. By sharing, you're giving others the chance to be there for you.

How Others View Your Sharing

One of the biggest fears about expressing feelings is how others will perceive it. Will they think it's annoying, silly, or unnecessary? Well, most of the time, people feel honoured and respected when someone trusts them enough to be vulnerable. It's likely that your friends and family would prefer to support you through tough times than see you struggle alone. Many adults wish they had learned earlier in life the importance of talking about their feelings. Holding things in can lead to feeling isolated, which isn't good for anyone's mental health. Remember, your family and friends care about you and would be keen to know not just about your successes but also about the challenges you face.

Practical Strategies for Sharing Your Feelings

1. Choose the right moment: Find a quiet time when you and the person you want to talk to aren't rushed or distracted. This helps make sure they can really listen to you.
2. Start small: If opening up feels daunting, start with sharing something small and gradually work your way to more significant feelings or concerns.
3. Use "I" statements: Instead of saying things like "You make me feel..." use phrases like "I feel..." This can help prevent the other person from feeling accused and keeps the focus on your experiences.
4. Be clear about what you need: Sometimes, you might just want someone to listen; other times, you might be seeking advice. Be clear about what you're looking for from the conversation, so the other person knows the best way to support you.
5. Practice makes perfect: The more you share your feelings, the easier it gets. Start practising with smaller issues, and as you feel more comfortable, you can move on to bigger things.

What If the Response Isn't What You Expected?

Sometimes, despite your best efforts, the person you're talking to might not respond the way you hoped. They could be distracted, not in the right headspace, or unsure how to react. It's important not to let this discourage you. You might need to try talking to someone else, or perhaps give the person some time and try again later. Remember, everyone has off days.

Your Feelings Are Valid Always Remember That

Whether or not someone understands your feelings right away, your emotions are always valid. You're entitled to feel what you feel, and you're also entitled to seek support. Being open about your emotions is a brave and worthwhile thing to do, and it can bring you closer to others. Moreover, being honest about your feelings often leads to better self-understanding and emotional growth. In conclusion, you're never a burden when you express your feelings. Sharing what's on your mind is essential for your mental health and for maintaining healthy relationships. Your friends and family care about your wellbeing, and letting them in helps them understand you better and provides them the opportunity to support you.

How are you feeling?

It is really important that when we need help, we feel able to ask for it. This could be speaking to a parent, a close friend, a teacher or someone else you trust. Sometimes it can be really hard to share our feelings with other people but if we are feeling low or don't know where to turn, sharing with others is really important. Teachers will always take you seriously and listen to your problems in confidence if you approach them for help. Likewise, parents, siblings or friends will help you if you reach out to them.

If you feel like you can't speak to anyone you know, there are people and organisations that can help support you:

• Childline - Call them on 0800 1111 any time of the day or night, every day of the week
• NSPCC - Call them on 0808 800 5000 between 10am and 4pm Monday to Friday or email them on help@NSPCC.org.uk
• The Samaritans – Call them on 116 123 any time of the day or night, every day of the week
• SANE – Call 0300 304 7000 for support (4:30pm - 10:30pm every day)
• Mind – Call 0300 123 3393 (9:00am - 6:00pm Monday to Friday)

*Sometimes we will use real life examples in our articles to aid understanding. When we do, names and ages will be changed.