10 Tips to Help You Cope if Your Parents Are Getting Divorced

Practical advice for teenagers on coping with their parents’ divorce, including emotional support, maintaining relationships, self-care, and staying resilient through changes in family dynamics.

About this article...

  • Suitable for members aged 12-17
  • 5 minute read
  • 871 words (2.2 sides of A4)
  • Providing help and guidance on Coping with divorce and Family
  • Created and reviewed by our team of experts

Let's get started...

When your parents are getting divorced, it can feel like your world is turning upside down. Divorce is challenging for families, and it's normal to experience a range of emotions during this time. While it's not easy, there are ways to cope and navigate these changes. Here are 10 tips to help you if your parents are going through a divorce.

1. Understand That It's Not Your Fault

One of the most important things to remember is that the divorce is not your fault. Relationships can be complicated, and your parents' decision to separate is about their situation, not anything you've done. Remind yourself that their issues are not a reflection of you or your worth.

2. Allow Yourself to Feel

It's normal to feel a mix of emotions during this time, such as sadness, anger, confusion, or even relief. Don't suppress your feelings, acknowledge them instead. Talk to someone you trust about how you're feeling, or write in a journal to express your emotions privately. It's okay to feel what you're feeling.

3. Ask Questions

Divorce can feel confusing, and you may not understand everything that's happening. It's okay to ask your parents questions about what the divorce means for you and your family. Questions like: 10 Tips to Help You Cope if Your Parents Are Getting Divorced
  • Where will I live?
  • Will I still see both parents?
  • How will holidays and special occasions work?
Clear communication can help you feel more secure about the changes ahead.

4. Don't Take Sides

It can be tempting to take sides if one parent seems more at fault, but it's important to maintain relationships with both parents if possible. Remember that their conflict is between them, not you. Try to stay neutral and focus on your own well-being.

5. Talk to Someone You Trust

Sometimes it helps to talk to someone outside the situation. This could be a friend, teacher, counsellor, or family member. Sharing your feelings with someone who listens and understands can make a big difference. Don't be afraid to ask for support when you need it.

6. Keep a Routine

Divorce often brings changes to your daily life, but sticking to a routine can help you feel grounded. Try to maintain consistency in areas like:
  • Schoolwork and study schedules.
  • Extracurricular activities or hobbies.
  • Time spent with friends.
A routine provides a sense of normality during uncertain times.

7. Take Care of Yourself

Looking after your physical and mental health is essential. Focus on:
  • Eating well: A balanced diet can boost your mood and energy levels.
  • Staying active: Exercise is a great way to relieve stress and improve your well-being.
  • Getting enough sleep: Rest helps you cope better with emotional challenges.
Prioritising self-care helps you stay resilient during difficult times.

8. Be Patient with Your Parents

Your parents are likely going through a tough time as well. They may not always handle things perfectly, but try to understand that they're doing their best. If you feel upset by something they've said or done, calmly express how you feel and suggest ways they can support you better.

9. Stay Connected to Both Parents

Even if one parent moves out, maintaining a relationship with both is important. Make an effort to spend time with each parent and communicate regularly. If you feel torn between them, let them know how you're feeling and ask for their support in managing these relationships.

10. Focus on What You Can Control

Divorce can make you feel powerless, but there are aspects of your life you can control. Focus on things that bring you joy and stability, such as:
  • Spending time with friends who lift your spirits.
  • Pursuing hobbies or trying new activities.
  • Setting personal goals, like improving in school or learning a new skill.
Taking charge of these areas can help you feel more confident and empowered.

Conclusion

Dealing with your parents' divorce is never easy, but with the right strategies, you can navigate this challenging time and come out stronger. Remember that it's okay to feel a range of emotions, and there are people and resources available to support you. By focusing on self-care, communication, and what you can control, you can find stability and happiness even during times of change.

How are you feeling?

It is really important that when we need help, we feel able to ask for it. This could be speaking to a parent, a close friend, a teacher or someone else you trust. Sometimes it can be really hard to share our feelings with other people but if we are feeling low or don't know where to turn, sharing with others is really important. Teachers will always take you seriously and listen to your problems in confidence if you approach them for help. Likewise, parents, siblings or friends will help you if you reach out to them.

If you feel like you can't speak to anyone you know, there are people and organisations that can help support you:

  • Childline - Call them on 0800 1111 any time of the day or night, every day of the week
  • NSPCC - Call them on 0808 800 5000 between 10am and 4pm Monday to Friday or email them on help@NSPCC.org.uk
  • The Samaritans – Call them on 116 123 any time of the day or night, every day of the week
  • SANE – Call 0300 304 7000 for support (4:30pm - 10:30pm every day)
  • Mind – Call 0300 123 3393 (9:00am - 6:00pm Monday to Friday)

*Sometimes we will use real life examples in our articles to aid understanding. When we do, names and ages will be changed.