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Let's talk about something that, while a bit tricky, everyone goes through at some point dealing with friends after a breakup. Whether it's your own relationship that has ended or your friends have split, it can make hanging out a bit awkward. You might find yourself in the middle of choosing sides or trying to chat without hurting someone's feelings. Here's how you cope and keep your friendships strong.

Understanding the Awkwardness

Firstly, it's completely normal to feel uncomfortable or unsure about what to say to your friends after a breakup. Emotions are running high, feelings are hurt, and sometimes, there might even be some anger floating around. Everyone involved needs a bit of space to sort their feelings out.

A breakup can disrupt the entire dynamic of your friendship group, especially if you all used to hang out together. It's like suddenly, your fun group chats and weekend hangouts have become a minefield of 'do's and 'don'ts. And guess what? It's okay to feel a bit lost during these times.

Talk It Out But Carefully

Communication is usually the key to sorting through messy situations. However, when emotions are involved, you need to step carefully. Here's how you can talk things out with your friends:

• Be Neutral: Try your best not to take sides. It might be tempting, especially if one of your friends confides in you more than the other. Remember, your role is to support your friends, not to judge or make decisions for them.
• Listen More Than You Speak: Sometimes, all your friends need is someone to listen. Let them express how they're feeling. Acknowledge their feelings, but avoid making comments that can be seen as taking sides.
• Watch Your Words: Be careful about what you say. Avoid bringing up the ex-partner unless your friend does so first. Also, steer clear of any gossip about the situation, as it can easily backfire.

These conversations can be tough, but they're also necessary. They help everyone understand each other better and can even prevent feelings of resentment from building up.

Respect Everyone's Space

After a breakup, your friends might need some space to heal and that's something you should respect. They might not be up for socialising as much, and that's fine. Give them the time they need, and don't take it personally. It doesn't mean they value your friendship any less; they just need time to sort themselves out.

But also, remember to check in on them. A simple message asking how they're doing can mean a lot. It shows that you care, but you're also respecting their need for space.

Don't Forget About Your Feelings

Watching your friends go through a breakup, or experiencing your own, can be emotionally draining for you too. It's important to look after your own feelings. If you're feeling overwhelmed, it's okay to step back. Talk to someone you trust about how you're feeling, whether it's a family member, a teacher, or another friend.

Keep engaging in activities you enjoy. Whether that's reading, playing sports, or watching movies, staying active in your hobbies can help keep your mind off the drama and stress.

Plan Neutral Activities

If you're planning to hang out with both friends who've broken up, pick neutral activities that don't remind them of their past relationship. Here are some ideas:

• Movie nights with new releases no one has seen
• Group sports like football or basketball
• Going to new places like museums or a different town
• Online gaming sessions where everyone can join from home

These activities can help create a new, relaxed, and neutral environment for your friends to enjoy without feeling the pressure of the past relationship.

Be Ready for Changes

Sometimes, despite your best efforts, the friendship dynamics might change and that's something you might have to accept. People grow and change, and so do relationships. It could be that your friends might not be as close as they used to be, or the group might shift a bit. What's most important is that you continue to offer your friendship and support, but also be open to making new friends and enjoying different experiences.

Breakups are never easy, and they can even reshape friendships. But with a bit of patience, compassion, and lots of understanding, you can navigate through this time and maybe even come out with stronger bonds than before.

Everyone's experiences are different, and that's okay. What matters most is how you handle them. So take it one step at a time, and remember, you're not alone in this.

How are you feeling?

It is really important that when we need help, we feel able to ask for it. This could be speaking to a parent, a close friend, a teacher or someone else you trust. Sometimes it can be really hard to share our feelings with other people but if we are feeling low or don't know where to turn, sharing with others is really important. Teachers will always take you seriously and listen to your problems in confidence if you approach them for help. Likewise, parents, siblings or friends will help you if you reach out to them.

If you feel like you can't speak to anyone you know, there are people and organisations that can help support you:

• Childline - Call them on 0800 1111 any time of the day or night, every day of the week
• NSPCC - Call them on 0808 800 5000 between 10am and 4pm Monday to Friday or email them on help@NSPCC.org.uk
• The Samaritans – Call them on 116 123 any time of the day or night, every day of the week
• SANE – Call 0300 304 7000 for support (4:30pm - 10:30pm every day)
• Mind – Call 0300 123 3393 (9:00am - 6:00pm Monday to Friday)

*Sometimes we will use real life examples in our articles to aid understanding. When we do, names and ages will be changed.